Line Of The Night:
Boobie Gibson — 33 points, 4 boards, 2 assists, 2 steals, 11-20 from downtown, 1 Rookie Game MVP
Yeah, that’s right, 20 shots, all from behind the 3-point line! And most of them right in front of this biggest fan, or at least the most famous, LeBron James, who was sitting court side. He’s about to mess around and pigeonhole himself. Seven of these came in the first half, as the Sophomores took the lead for good, coming away with the 6th straight win for the 2nd-year guys. Time for another format change, maybe?
Play Of The Night:
No doubt about this. Sean Williams, for the rookie squad, came with an All-Star game favorite — the “throw it off the board to your self” slam. The dribbling and passing came as a little bit of a surprise from Andre Three-thou… er, Williams, as it usually comes from the more wing-type players. We also found out that Williams loves to throw up various hand signals, and seems to be a member of the Drew Gooden-”head”ed “All-Airhead” team. Goofball.
Beating Up On The Neighborhood Kids Of The Night:
Terrell Owens — 18 points and the celebrity game MVP
Despite showing up late, Owens dominated this game, as a man in his athletic prime playing against out-of-shape celebrities should! It was ridiculous, as he clearly had everybody out-matched. T.O. even dunked it, CONVINCINGLY! Teammate Master P’s clutch free throws helped earn their squad the win, locking up the award for Owens. But seriously, was this even fair? The WNBA pros simply go through the motions, letting the celebs compete and enjoy themselves. T.O. was having that, saying “I crush you cock-a-roaches”.
Worst Of The Night:
The overall feel of the Celebrity Game. We blame ESPN for this. We understand a celebrity game isn’t the biggest draw in the world, but MTV Rock-N-Jock used to do it well. ESPN turns it into an absolute train wreck. How is it a good idea to turn a huge chunk of the broadcast into a cooking show? There is probably a way to do that well, but that was not it. Then Carmelo, who apparently doesn’t have a single musical bone in his body, is invited into an attempt at a Jazz duet? And what in the haaa-yell was that tarot card reader? Amare Stoudemire could not even attempt to take that nut bag seriously! That was wild.
But the worst part every year is the attempt to make the announcers and reporters into the stars. Ya’ll ain’t got Charles and Kenny. Looks like even Greg Anthony and Tim Legler have refused to participate in these ridiculousness. As B or C-List as many of the celebrity participants may be, their Q-ratings are 1,000 times greater than Ric Bucher. Ric Bucher? Please. If he’s not telling us which ball Kobe scratched first when he woke up this morning, then we don’t want to hear it. Um… scratch that. Just shut the hell up on all occasions.
They missed out on a close game, but how could anyone watching be expected to get into it with all the ridiculous sideshows. The players tried to take it seriously, despite the surrounding circus, and the 1-point margin of victory will most likely result in the most competitive game of the weekend. Common got hacked!
Worst Of The Night Part II:
Charles Barkley needs to stop the hate crimes on Kevin Durant. He had the nerve to say that of all the players on the court for the Rookie Challenge, if he could only pick 1 to start a franchise, he would pick in the following order: 1) Brandon Roy, 2) Al Horford, 3) Yi Jianlian. The Chuckster done lost his mind. We totally disagree, but we understand the Roy and Horford arguments. However, hopefully by now you’ve seen the glaring omission from this list — KEVIN DURANT!!!!!!!!! Barkley was ranting about how one-dimensional was, while on the court, Durant was balling out, dropping dimes, blocking shots and rebounding. His regular season stats don’t show it yet, but this young cat is crazy versatile. If we could have Durant OR all of those 3, we’d still take KD — he’s gonna be that good. Jianlian? Come on, Chuck. At least Kenny called him out on it, a little.
Player Most Respected In The Huddle Of The Night:
In the celebrity game, Chris Tucker was bombing 3’s like it was Rush Hour 99. Dude had zero conscience. He hit three 3’s, two off glass! He absolutely did not care. His jump shot was so ugly that FEMA had to be called (and didn’t come) to New Orleans, AGAIN! Disgusting. So going into the last possession, with his squad down one, his teammate, Floyd Mayweather, said something to the effect of: “Don’t shoot no 3 this time!”, with a menacing look and tone. Comedy. They came out and you can be damn sure Tucker did not fire, even though he received the inbounds pass! Classic. He couldn’t WAIT to pass.
Mailroom Supervisor’s H.O.N.nie Of The Night:
Straight from the MRSV mouth: “Al Horford for rocking that mouth guard to protect the pearly whites.” Charles Barkley agrees, we’re sure. Can you say “man crush”?
Fashion Review Of The Night:
We’re not even sure what to say about the celebrity uniforms. Purple, blue and teal argyle? Those joints were horrible. At least the purple with gold shine warm-up t’s were kinda hot.
Kevin Durant debuted his new shoes, which are solid neon, Oregon Duck yellow. In fact, as Craig Sager interviewed Durant prior to the game, the camera panned down and the Earth was nearly split to the core from the color explosion unleashed by KD’s dogs on the same screen as Sager’s shiny Easter Egg pastel purple dress shoes!
The veteran players sitting sideline at the Rookie Challenge always come dressed to impress, and this year was no exception. LeBron was sitting with K.G., and each brought their own unique style. The L.O.N. offices disagreed on who was stylin’ on who. The MRSV preferred Garnett’s patented, preppy sweater over collared-shirt look, while the C.E.O. was feeling LeBron’s urban casual, as he rocked a multi-colored (possibly a tribute to his high school colors — green and gold) leather coat, jeans, and matching A-1’s. The King also had an interesting, relatively subtle double-pendant chain. Chris Paul followed The Kid’s lead, as he had on his own neon-yellow sweater (is neon yellow the new black?), but his accessory was a fat wad of hundreds that he pulled out to pay for his court side refreshments! And despite not being a part of the main event for the first time in ages, Big Shaq was on hand looking distinguished in one of his trademark suits.
Worst dressed? Sorry, but it had to be Carmelo Anthony. In attendance with his wife, LaLa Vazquez, Melo rocked a Valentine’s Day-themed ensemble featuring a red leather coat and a baseball hat with a big heart on it. That might sound bad, but he actually could’ve pulled it off… if it had been V-Day! That was yesterday, homey.
Tony Parker wins NBA Live tourney at EA Sports party… Andrea Bargnani came out aggressive, but then disappeared for the rest of the game. Sam Mitchell was like, “Now, there’s my guy!”… Common, with the baldy and just the way he plays, is officially the Jason Kidd of the celebrity circuit… One Tree Hill’s James Lafferty was possible the best non-professional player in the celeb game, but they wouldn’t give him the ball enough… Gangsta rap fans everywhere celebrated as Master P rolled on Common! Ha… Was Terry Crews in The Mitchell Report? He came out muscled-down and shouting like a crazy man. Then during a break, he showed ridiculous dance moves. Who knew he was the poor-man’s Jamie Foxx? AKA the most talented man in Hollywood?… The kids at the Rookie Game were like European futbol fans, just screaming for no reason, constantly… Sorry, Paul Millsap, please respectfully decline all future All-Star-type invites. It’s just not your scene, playa… FREE AL THORNTON!
